Transcript
Epic I
Tort Bunny stares at her exam.
End of panel.
We see part of a crim law hypo.
It goes something like this:
Final Exam
Question 1. In order to lose weight for a new role, actor Keanu Cruise has been on strict vegan
diet. After a leading film critic lambasted his acting abilities however, Cruise broke down, went
to the only Nathan's Famous in Texahoma, and consumed three pounds of hot dogs.
While leaving Nathan's, Cruise saw his friend Angelina Smith. He waved at her and said, "I ate
too many wieners." Smith then pulled a gun out of her purse and shouted, "This one's for you
Mr. Anderson!"
Terrified, Cruise dived through the window of a closed gun store. The owner of the store, who
was standing behind the counter at the time, told investigators that Cruise grabbed a gun off the
counter, stepped out, aimed at Smith, and fired off six shots.
Smith dodged all of the bullets. One bullet, however, hit and killed a Girl Scout standing behind
Smith. Another bullet ricocheted off a wall, bounced off a metal pole, and lodged itself in the
bagel of a sassy passing bassist. The bassist would later inadvertently eat the bullet and die of
lead poisoning.
After Cruise fired the shots, both Cruise and Smith were both tackled by bystanders and arrested.
During her interrogation, Smith said that she thought Cruise looked like Tom Anderson, the man
suspected of murdering her son a week earlier. Anderson has been on the run from police but had
been calling Smith on the phone every night since the murder to taunt her. He was last sighted
near Nathan's Famous. When she saw Cruise / Anderson, she believed that he was giving her the
finger and saying, "Neener neener neener." Enraged, she pulled out her gun and pointed it at him.
Although the gun was not loaded, Smith said that she thought it was. When asked if she intended
to pull the trigger, she said, "I don't know. I was still thinking about it."
Dave B. Oppy, a reasonable man standing next to Smith, thinks that Cruise looked absolutely
nothing like Anderson.
You are a clerk to the District Attorney. Write a memo to the DA, analyzing Cruise's and
Smith's possible criminal liability and possible defenses. Recommend which charges, if any,
should be filed and explain why. Include, as part of your recommendation, your views of the
most appropriate disposition of the case in light of the actors' conduct, the harm caused, and
the purposes served by any prosecution. Note that excerpts from some Texahoma statutes are
attached.
End of panel.
The exam becomes gibberish.
End of panel.
Tort Bunny notices the words are beginning to pool around her.
End of panel.
Tort Bunny begins to drown in words. Her single desperate black paw juts out of the sea of words.
End of panel.
Brown Rabbit grabs her paw.
Caption: to be continued ...
End of comic.
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